2x02 - Vitas Mortis

J: (on being left in the foyer) Take a number, have a seat, no magazines... typical.
This is the exact reason why I take a book with me everywhere I go.

J: (the attendant returns) Number 78?
If you're not already familiar with the concept, sometimes instead of queuing up, one must take a numbered slip of paper that marks one's place in the waiting queue. John's obviously hoping it's his turn.

(Zhaan and John are arguing about the Luxan Holy Woman)
J: She could have been excommunicated... for stickin' her hands... in other people's business!
Excommunication is to deprive someone of the right of church membership by ecclesiastical authority, usually for some heresy or other bad act. (Dictionary.com) John is also making a play of words on the phrase "to stick one's nose into other people's business."

J: (on D'Argo's tattoos) So, you, uh... you got the bar codes of a General, but you aren't one.
A bar code is a series of vertical bars containing the UPC (Universal Price Code) of a product. The bar code is scanned to obtain the price. A site fan wrote in to let us know that a bar code is also military slang for the stripes marking the rank.

J: So let's get back to Moya and heat up some Irish-Coffees.
Poor John, how he misses the little comforts. Here's a recipe for Irish Coffee.

D'Argo tells John he is going to attend Nilaam--
J: She wants you to... attend her. What... exactly does that mean?
D: Whatever she wants it to mean.
J: So... if she wants to rip out your liver and snack on it with a Chianti, she can do that?
Silence of the Lambs reference, lol

J: ( agitated ) Strike two... I do not like the sound of "transferring energy" either.
Again with the baseball metaphors. A "strike" is a pitched ball that is counted against the batter, typically one that is swung at and missed.

C: (to Rygel) Clamp it, frog lips.
and a bit later
C: He's right, Toad Face
I had to include this one because John calls Rygel 'frog lips' at some point in season 1. I wouldn't imagine that they have frogs or toads in the uncharted territories so she either picked the phrase up from John or the translator microbes have picked up that phrase.

J: We got lucky... Sparky's got a big ass.
P: Pardon?
J: Butt... hole... I'll explain later, Pilot.
Okay, I'm still trying to decide how to approach this one. I can go all academic and clinical, or I can be juvenile about it. Frankly, I'm undecided.

A: What was that?
J: Pins and needles! You're askin' the wrong spaceman.
John is referring to the tingling pain you get when your foot goes numb from sitting on it or waiting too long to move it from a cramped position.